Pre-Homesick Syndrome

I’ve been away for almost 2 years now, and I can’t believe myself that I still suffer from this syndrome.

Pre-homesick syndrome adalah perasaan tak nak balik belajar Shah Alam yang membuak-buak rentetan daripada cuti panjang serta perasaan takut untuk menghadapi liku-liku dan ranjau hidup di tempat orang. (Cehh!) *Haha*

This happens to me EACH time, after a very long, relaxing, exciting holiday at home. What I’m afraid of, really? It’s not like this is the first freaking time that I will be away from my family.

Negative sides of Me.

The thing is, this semester begins with 10 weeks of lectures and the only break would be only during Raya. Starting from next semester, I cannot balik sesuka hati during weekend because SMF will be having lots of activities and It’s gonna be quite hectic. Kalau dulu, rasa homesick je, I’ll look for a cheap flight ticket or bus ticket just to go home and melepas rindu.

And I hate my new class schedule. There are so many gaps in between classes. Nak buat apa kan? Nak tidur pun serba salah takut tertinggal kelas. Then, there will be class at 4pm, which is usually masa untuk aku meniduri diri (Oh, that sounds so wrong.haha)

And the main reason is, I’m gonna miss my crazy, amazing, loud family so freaking baddd. I had so much fun of doing nothing at home. Usik adik-adik, hangout ngan family, shopping ngan mama and sis, the crazy food that will be served depan mata (masakan mama terbaik!), no chores (I don’t have to do my laundry!) etc.. Oh, im so gonna miss all that!! =( And as tak ramai dah kat rumah nanti, I’m worried about Mama. She’s not really well. Who will look after her? *sedih* Family matters the most to me, as Mama told me, “Ingat orang yang kita sayang ni memang menyakitkan.” Yeah, it hurts. If only Law course is offered in Kelantan. *sigh*

Positive sides of me

Dear self,

Tolong lah ingat, belajar untuk siapa? Untuk Allah and family. You’re away to pursue your dreams, to make your family proud of you. There’s no used of being so down, you need to WAKE UP, Fatin!! You’re one strong girl!! New semester, new hopes, new attitudes! You used to tell yourself, “ The best way to be happy is by not thinking too much” So, pleaseeeeee. I beg you dear self, janganlah down-down macam ni lagi.

Tak banyak cuti this semester? Weekend dah susah nak balik? I’m sure you gonna figure that out. Plan awal-awal bila weekend yang betul-betul free then you can always go home. But on the other side, cuti tak banyak is quite good. Sebab each time bila cuti, bila nak balik Shah Alam. Pre-Homesick Syndrome, again!

The new class schedule. Bila tengok balik, I think the schedule is quite OK. I dun mind class at 8.30am but when it comes to the gaps, masa tu lah boleh balik rumah sewa, rest, tanpa terkejar-kejar for next class kan. Kalau dulu, class finished at 12.20, balik rumah dah almost 1.00, pastu nak kejar-kejar pergi kelas at 2.00 pulak. It was tiring kan. But with the new schedule, at least boleh relax sikit.

Missing your family? You can always give ‘em a ring. Nak-nak lagi Mama dah ada FB now, boleh la sentiasa contact.You need to be independent. Malu lah anak sulung macam ni. Malu dekat adik-adik yang dekat asrama. You need to give good examples. Furthermore, kat sana nanti ramai kawan-kawan that are always there for you, your bestfriends, housemates, classmates. I’m sure you gonna have amazing time with them. *Wink* Ingat, whenever you feel sad or down, don’t ever be alone. Nanti jadi lagi sedih.

Whatever it is, it’s in your hands. To be positive or not to be, it’s your choice. InsyaAllah this coming semester would be just fine and who knows, It will be one of the best semesters ever?

Quotes of the day:

One you placed negative thoughts with positives one, you'll start having positive results ~ Willie Nelson

Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine. ~Anthony J. D'Angelo, The College Blue Book

Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same. ~Francesca Reigler

† Granado Espada: Revolution of Online Game †

Granado Espada, is a Korean online game launched in year 2006. It is so popular among many countries and in fact most of the players in the S.E.Asia server are from Malaysia, Singapore, Philippines and Vietnam.


Notably, Granado Espada won the 2006 Korean awards for Best Graphics and Game of the Year. The graphic is pretty amazing for a game that is being launched so many years ago.


Its concept and design of the game can be said to be unseen in all the previous online game, such as the ability for players to control multiple characters at the same time, also known as multiple control. Each of the character will have different skills and moves that won't make the players feel dull.


Granado Espada features a unique art style based on the Baroque period of Europe, differing from the standard sword and sorcery fantasy themes or ching chong Chinese kung fu fighting theme of the genre. Even the music of the entire game is attractive enough for you to download.


The world of Granado Espada takes place on a newly discovered continent based on the setting of Americas during the Age of Exploration. Its world is divided into different maps and grouped into themed regions such as forests, tropical jungles, plains, swamps, deserts and ice fields.


The first English version of the game began Open Beta Testing in year 2007. The game was originally released under a pay-to-play model but due to high cost maintenance, many players draw out from the game. Granado Espada is then launched as a free online game and that is why this game is currently surviving for years without a problem.


Talks about 'free', of course not everything is free. If you're playing the game without paying any money, you'll ended up stuck with some normal looking character or else you'll get something really nice just like the pretty girl with a black wing standing beside my character.

Dear my one and only sister,

I cant believe that time flies super fast. It feels like yesterday we were playing masak-masak together and now you’re a big girl, you’re going into university sis! We both are mahasiswi, how cool is that??

I know I’m not such a good sister, I am such a nuisance to you but Kakak does love you. We share clothes, make-ups, and even secrets that Mama doesn’t even know. Hehe. Dulu masa kecik-kecik baju mesti sama, kalau x sama, colour lain. Hehe. Sometimes, ada orang ingat kita twins, even until now pon. We argue A LOT, even on simple and petty things. But blood is thicker than water huh? Gaduh2 pon mesti last2 baik balik. *smile*

I now sometimes I’m being cold dan suka je comment. But I did that because I’m being concern about you, because I care about my baby sister. I know I never apologize, so do you, egoistic runs in our blood, but I am truly sorry if I ever hurt your feelings

Dah masuk Uni ni, it’s a whole new world to you Sis. University is wayyy different than high school. As much it offers you FREEDOM but freedom will lead you to temptations. Jaga diri dik. Pilih kawan betul-betul. Ramai yang salah pilih kawan and they end up getting worse. Study smart. Solat kena jaga. Make our parents proud of you. It’s no harm to sacrifice FUN in order to achieve the best. Ok, Kakak meleter lagi like she always do. Haha.

As we both are taking different directions now, dah tak tinggal sbumbung lagi, nanti after belajar dah kerja, pastu kahwin ( ok, tak saba!! Hah) dan berkeluarga. Dah tak boleh gaduh cam dulu-dulu lagi. Dah tak boleh ketuk kakak ngan sudu lagi. But that doesn’t mean that we’re apart at heart. I’m gonna miss you and the memories we shared, that’s for sure.

You were my childhood friend, my friend and my one and only sister. I wish you the best of luck in your future undertakings, in experiencing a whole new exciting journey in university. You’ll love it, trust me.

Love,

Kakakmu yang comel. *Hehe*

-XOXO-

we both love taking pictures ngn gedixxnya together!!

(P/S: I know you might not read this , but I still hope you do )

Quote of the day:

Having a sister is like having a best friend you can't get rid of. You know whatever you do, they'll still be there. ~Amy Li

Yeah, saya nangis bila favorite football team saya kalah!!

This may sound to some a bit silly, overacting, and childish, but yeah, I’ll cry when my team lose an important match

These are some reactions that I normally get:

A: “Alaaa babe, relax aa.. Bola je kot. Bukan break ngn boyfie ka, bukan mak sakit ka…”

Reply (Dalam Hati ): “ if break ngn boyfriend pon I won’t be this sad kot! *Haha* ”

B: “biasala pertandingan. Ada menang, ada kalah. Adat kot”

Reply (Dalam Hati) : “but I prefer to be a winner after all. Who doesn’t?”

C: “Takde guna ko nanges sebab bola. Entah-entah pemain-pemain tu tengah bergembira kat club”

Reply (Dalam Hati) : "Mana ko tahu? Ko pun ada kat club ngan diorang kah?”

D: "Chill la Fatin, it’s JUST a game after all”

Reply (Dalam Hati): “Just a game? It’s the matter of life and death ok. *Haha*”

.................................................................................................................................

Football has been part of my life. Ask those who are close to me, they know. I may not be an expert in this game, I may not give brilliant comments, but I just love the game from the bottom of my heart.

So, crying after losing a match is quite NORMAL to me. Hehe *blush2*

I cried when Arsenal lost to Liverpool in quarter final UCL 2007/2008 because UCL was at that time the only chance for Arsenal to win the trophy for the very first time. (But I still love the great run by Theo to allow Adebayor to score)

I cried in season 2009/2010 BPL when Arsenal lost to Spurs (second game) because I knew, losing point at such critical time meant burning Arsenal chance to win BPL after 6 seasons.

And yesterday, I cried like a baby when France was tragically unqualified for knockout stage. It’s tearing up my heart to see my favourite national team to be kicked out from Worldcup in such humiliation. They did not even win a single game in the group stage. (Kalau nak cerita pasal France ni, memang tak akan habis *sedeh2* )

But eventhough seeing my favourite team lose; I never give up on them. *wink2* I still support them through ups and downs. That shows how much I love ‘em and how loyal I am. (Puji diri sendiri *haha*)

Usually, after my team kalah, mesti ada kawan-kawan a.k.a. rivals in football that would text me, call, and post something at my FB wall yang akan ejek/perli/sindir. But honestly, I don’t really mind because criticism makes me stronger! You can mock me, because I will do the same thing if I were in your shoes. *Haha* (evil laugh)

So as for FIFA Worlcup 2010, as France is no longer competing, I will now show my endless support to La Furia Roja, my other team.

Viva La Espana!!

(P/S: To my dearest friend who cheered me up last night; thanks a bunch! You know who you are!)

Quote of the day:

When I get older, I will be stronger

They’ll call me freedom, just like a Waving Flag

And then it goes back

-K’naan, FIFA Worldcup Offical Theme Song

One Perfect Trip =)

Pulau Perhentian, 17th-19th June 2010

Let the pictures do the writing yaww!

the ladies ;D

anak-anak ;D

ready to snorkel yaww!

la familia ;D

the gedixx *haha*

sunset is soooo sexy! ;)

kanak-kanak riang ;D

in front of the villa ;)

It was AWESOME!! I've always love beach!

Nak pegi lagiii!! <3

(P/S: x pakai sunblock, so now dah mcm adik beradik drogba dahh..haha)

Quote of the day:

A vacation is like love - anticipated with pleasure, experienced with discomfort, and remembered with nostalgia. ~Author Unknown

Buat insan yang bergelar BAPA =)

I am lucky because I have 2 dads. (Alhamdulillah) Abah and Papa. One is my step dad, another is my biological dad. =)

Abah,

I know, even you’re my step dad, u treat us just like your own children, and I couldn’t be more thankful to Him for granting us, you. You gave us love and you bring happiness to our family. Being in a split-family, I’ve never ever felt terrible or left out because Mama has never abandoned us and you treat us sooooo well to the extent some people don’t believe that you’re not my real dad. I know you don’t like people calling you step dad. “dad is enough,” u said. That is another great quality that you own, you’ve always want us be and to feel like his own children. To list your good deeds or what you have done to me is almost impossible because the list will go on and on until the day I die. Thanks for bringing me up for these past 8 years. Thanks for accepting me to be your daughter. You’re one great dad Abah. I know I cant repay your sacrifice but I promise you I will study hard to fulfill Mama’s dream & yours , me becoming a judge, just like you. I’ve never wanted to study law, but seeing you were really excited and happy when I chose to follow your footsteps, I told myself that what I’m doing now is worth it. I hope I will make you proud. I will not disappoint you. Love you till the end. *tear*

Papa,

I know we rarely see each other nor talk to one another, but you’ll always be my dad. Without you, I will not be born in this world. I will not be for whom I am today if it’s not because of you. Eventhough distant separates us, but I’ve never forget you. I’ll always cherish the moment when our family were together. When I was born, you were there to whisper His name into my ears.. When I said my first words, You were there for me, to teach me the whole dictionary if need be. When i took my first steps, you were there to encourage me on. When I had my first day at school, you were there with me, waiting until I stopped crying. And that’s something I’ll always reminisce. Love you.

"Happy Father’s Day"

Cherish your fathers when they are still breathing before it’s too late.

Quote of the Day:

"The greatest gift I ever had

Came from God, and I call him Dad!"

~~Author Unknown.

Alhamdulillah =)

One of the things I hate the most is waiting for result. Gila bab* punya nervous sampai termimpi-mimpi dan terketar2 lutut just when thinking bout it. My parents give high expectation to see me do really well in examinations. Lagi la I rase im carrying burden on my shoulder to prove to them that I can make them proud..

Yang paliiiiiinggg nervous was my SPM result. I wasn’t quite a bright student then (now pon.haha) Igt lagi pagi nk amik result SPM tuu awal2 da nanges, result x amik pon lagi. *Haha* Cikgu2 smua tegur. Dahla diorg pnggil yg dpt straight A’s dlu baru nk pnggil aku yg x brapa nk straight A’s ni. Pnggil 11A, tade name aku (of course la, amik pon 10 subjects je), Bila 10A, pon takdeee!! *Nanges3* Then bila yg 9A namaku dipnggil lagiiilaaa nanges. Hehe. Alhamdulillah.

Skrg kat UiTM plak pkai system online nk check result. Awl2 msa prelaw dlu mmg x biasa. Now dah kinda used to it even server uitm cam @%!$%. Nak dijadikan crita, d latest result klua on 10th June, after 12pm. But I was in UiTM for few days (jadi volunteer for IHL) so susah nk check result sbb takde internet access.

Sbelum 10th June, byk kali gak ah mimpi psal result. I wasn’t really confident because the papers were quite hard (consti law especially), n d lecturers yang ajar kitorg plak strict, dgn last sem punya result yg sgt x mmbrnsgkan!! But of course because I did pulled my ass off during the finals, deep in my heart I nak gak dpt DL.

10th of June – Agak busy that day. Tapi lepas dgr sorg2 da taw result, nak gak check. curi2 masa pegi check kat lab computer. Tapi disebabkan server uitm yg begitu “lajuuu”, aku x dpt tgk even da refresh 40juta kali. Org yg dpt check tuu mmg lucky ah. Brapa kali gak pegi lab com that day, but still……… Malam tuu byk la dgr crita rmai yg improve la, rmai DL laa, ad gak yg jatuh laa. Lagi la ku jadi nervous dibuatnya.

11th June- pagi tuu again curi2 pegi check result. Hehe. Tapi Alhamdulillah. Berjayaa gak check!! Tgk my GPA, tros klua airmata kegmbiraan. Syukur2. It was even wayyyy better than what I expected. “3.xx” *wink*. I didn’t expect it at all to be honest. But, syukur Alhamdulillah. Terus call mama after that. Bila dgr je mama sounded so happy, I felt like, “yeah! My mission is accomplished!” =’)

“Ya Allah, Aku bersyukur padaMu kerana telah memakbulkan doaku”

Without my family especially mama who is my source of motivation, lecturers yang byk bagi tnjuk ajar kat driku yang x sbrapa nak pndai ni, kawan2 yang banyak tolong aku, I know I wont success *wink*

Quote of the day:

The true failure is when you stop trying ;)

(P/S: IHL was super-duper fun!! )